seethingblue's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- too many carbohydrates clouding up my thinking everyone was singing bad kareoke in my dreams...my mother was drunk, swaying side to side...dogs barking...and every sound i hate melded into one big collective voice telling me how insane i am but dreams are dreams... arguments erupt every day between erica and i...we don't get along...we don't even like each other...and each of us blames it on things we did when we were ten and seven...i could NEVER EVER live with my sisters again...i swear it... which brings me back to my dreams...this guilt is like that glitzy bar, nobody is listening to one another...every thought i have is clanging around in my head because it never gets the chance to escape...all the noise i want to go to the movies soon...i miss sitting in a dark theater...just being able to focus on other lives for two hours or so...buttery popcorn hands...fizzy soda pop...cavities(!-i am very afraid of cavities...my paranoia) string me up like party lights, yeah... these arguments are wearing me down, a big gaping hole...yes, a cavity...everything boils down to the quality of your dental care... the chattering of your teeth, the point when you stopped sucking your thumb...the path a tongue makes during the perfect kiss those coffee stains, those tobacco stains those gaps where even the dental floss won't go... it makes you wonder how futile the words "i'm sorry" can be... because i'm not sorry at all i'm only hungry, tired...mad at the people who steal my seat on the bus 10:27 a.m. - 2001-12-07 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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